Or, Embodied Doctrine for Younger Women
Scripture: Titus 2:4-5
Date: July 21, 2024
Speaker: Sean Higgins
Men cannot do some crucial things that women can do. Women can do some of what men can do, even if sometimes poorly. What women can do that men can’t do belongs with their glory and is part of their uniquely female image-bearing value.
Peter told husbands to show honor to their wives as weaker vessels (1 Peter 3:7). While this weakness has application to opening jars and moving furniture without condescension, a man should consider his wife to be like fine china rather than daily dishes which are sturdy, but disposable.
Reproductively (which is no small concern for a family and for the future), women have both more scarcity and vulnerability than men. A woman has a limited window of pregnancy opportunities, and her life changes significantly more than a man’s with each successful pregnancy and birth. Her weaker/softer/more delicate nature is a feature for this life nurturing not a failure, and so she should be honored for not being like a man.
Sometimes we read the instructions for women/wives like they are inferior, when what we should see is that they are not replaceable or interchangeable with men, and that’s good.
That said, women have their own temptations to sin. Not only was Eve deceived, which Paul generalized as a reason for why women shouldn’t teach men in 1 Timothy 2:12-15, God disciplined Eve in Genesis 3:16 with the new reality that she would be ruled by her husband. For that matter, if she behaves wrongly, the reputation of her God is affected as we see at the end of Titus 2:5.
Though a foolish woman tears down her house, the wise woman is a house-builder (Proverbs 14:1). This is how she embodies sound doctrine.
and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled. (Titus 2:4–5 ESV)
Older women had four characteristics, which younger women should also pursue: being reverent, not slanderers, not winos, and good-teachers. The younger women are the target of that teaching with seven virtues. Paul assumes the younger women were married, or at least that marriage was normal and good for young women.
And so train (ESV) or “encourage” (NASB) or “urge” (NIV) are all fine, though the original word is a verbal form of self-control. So Tyndale translated the beginning of verse 4, “and so make sobre mynded,” or one dictionary defines the action as to “bring to one’s senses” (BAGD). This emphasizes that such virtues can be learned and developed, and should be taught by the older women. Develop an appreciation for the glory of what she builds and how her building glorifies God’s Word.
More than the men are (at least in this paragraph), a young woman is to be known by her relations, and the first relations are those in her house. She is to be a house builder.
In Paul’s other letters he commands husbands to love their wives and wives to submit/respect their husbands. Peter says something similar, at least for wives. In general, it seems right to acknowledge that most men desire admiration and most women desire affection. But that doesn’t mean your man hates being loved, let alone that Jesus said that the world knows we are Christians by our love.
This isn’t strictly a grammatical command, but a young woman should be characterized as a husband-lover. It’s one word, a compound adjective in Greek (philandrous used only here in the NT). Other helpful phrases are: she’s “in to” her husband, she’s affectionately turned toward her husband, she’s “attached to” him.
Love for one’s own spouse is natural (or should be), it is supernatural, and love — actually felt and shown and spoken — is the foundation of the house.
This second virtue for younger women is also one word, another compound adjective in Greek (philoteknous used only here in the NT), another relationship. She should love her (own) offspring. A young woman should be characterized as a children-lover.
How do you talk about someone you love? Can you love a son without disciplining him? Are you loving a daughter by letting her be a boy-lover before the boy has made the covenant, you know, because it’s cute?
A woman/mother should love her actual sons and daughters, and this includes a general mindset that is pro-life.
This is the most referenced virtue in Titus 2, explicitly mentioned for older men, younger women, and the one-and-only attribute insisted on for young men. I will spend more time defining the virtue of being self-controlled when we get to verse 6.
But temptations abound to fly off the broom handle when kids backtalk, or to give your husband/kids the death stare, or to fight when other ladies try to boss or badmouth your kids (the mama bear is bad news, see Proverbs 17:12). And self-control starts with oneself, obviously, which includes your thoughts and your feelings; your reactions are yours.
Older women are to be reverent in behavior, known as those who clearly have worshiped. Older women aren’t always as desirable in body, whereas younger women with time on their hands might find excuses to be unfaithful. A younger woman should be chaste, she should be one-man woman if she’s got a man, or waiting for him.
Rarely does anyone wake up one morning in the bed of adultery, Surprise! Sexual impurity always starts in the heart, and what you dwell on, what you choose as entertainment distractions, will direct you or drag you around.
Yet another compound adjective, a mash-up of the word for worker and for house (oikourgous only found here in the NT), working at home . Being busy-at-home is a virtue, an attribute, an orientation.
It’s also considered by many in our current culture as sexist, misogynistic, old-fashioned, oppressive, and ignorant.
It’s a building question. Whose bottom line do you want to promote? Which relationships and responsibilities deserve your best attention and affection?
”The devoted wife and mother finds her absorbing interest in the innumerable duties of the home.” —D. Edmond Hiebert
This adjective is not a geofence; she doesn’t need a necklace/collar that shocks her if she gets too far away from the kitchen. It is an offensive effort against being a busy-body, going house to house gathering up gossip dust-bunnies and spreading them around (1 Timothy 5:13). Sweep your own floor, wash your own dirty laundry.
In terms of receiving, kindness has a welcoming warmth, a readiness for questions, an invitation to be interrupted for good reason. In terms of giving, kindness has an eye to meet needs and fill bellies, hands that provide, words that build up.
Being kind is a lot of the how and some of the what. It is possible to think she’s building her house, when what she’s building is a wall between herself and the others. The pillows on the couch are always in order, and that’s because she’s criticized everyone so many times no one wants to touch them. She wonders why they stay in their room so much.
This is actually not a compound adjective, it’s a compound participle, a verb, an ongoing action. She’s to be being submissive to [her] own husband . The reason I say “ruled” is from Genesis 3:16 when God told the women that her husband would rule over her.
She’s to put herself under. The breakdown of the verb submissive is “arrange under,” put oneself in a position to yield.
As a Christian and member of the church, a woman is under the authority of the elders, who should be men. As a Christian and member of society, a woman is under the authority of governors, who also should be men. And yet, while those offices should be held by men, their authority isn’t because their gender. So a younger woman does not submit to a man just because he is a man. (Fathers and mothers, teach your daughters who she must submit to, and who she can freely ignore.)
She must submit to her own man, to her husband (and to her father before that). The virtues for a young woman are bookended by her relationship to her husband.
One purpose Paul gives: that the word of God may not be reviled .
Her failure brings blaspheming (blasphemetai), it’s being critical of God’s Word, and of God Himself as the source. While it could be her husband’s complaint, the island was watching (including “opponents” see verse 8). Alternatively, when she builds her house, God and His Word are honored; Christianity is good for the house, for the world. She shines and her people shine and sound doctrine shines. She will be talked about.
Sure, teach the girls to play house, invite them to help you build the house. What virtue of female glory can you strengthen today? What temptation against female glory can you resist today?
Here is a fatherly desire:
“May our sons in their youth
be like plants full grown,
our daughters like corner pillars
cut for the structure of a palace”
(Psalm 144:12 ESV)
Among the applications this includes wanting our Titus 2:4-5 young women to be strong for building households on. We build them up to be house builders (think again of Proverbs 14:1).
None of the Titus 2 virtues require more money, they do require more grace. God is able to make all grace abound to you. All the Titus 2 virtues require strength, even sacrifices, more than you think you have ready. That’s good, because you want God’s surpassing power to shine.
[May God] make you worthy of his calling and fulfill every resolve for good and every work of faith by his power, so that the name of our Lord Jesus may be glorified in you, and you in him, according to the grace of our God and the Lord Jesus Christ. (2 Thessalonians 1:11–12 ESV)