The Kindness Boomerang

Or, The Defenseless Folly of Resisting Reality

Scripture: Proverbs 21:21

Date: November 6, 2022

Speaker: Sean Higgins

I am thankful(!) for the PUD, usually and especially these last few days, and while fully understandable, the one piece of information that everyone signs in to the outage center to see hasn’t been available after this last storm: Estimated Time to Restoring service. That’s what we really want to know. I don’t have the answer to that this morning, nor is the sermon threading a timely needle.

The next paragraph in Romans would totally be applicable (it includes 8:28!), yet I don’t want many to miss it, and maybe preaching something a shorter in light of the lack of light, and the circumstances, will work for today.

So am I giving you the answer(s) you were hoping for this morning? Perhaps (not). But it’s also proverbial, and fits with our ongoing Sunday evening series, so there’s that. The title for this sermon is: “The Kindness Boomerang”

Being kind is a God-honoring, Christian virtue, part of the fruit of the Spirit. It can also be Thomas Kinkaided, pictured as something a little too simple and syrupy; it’s very easy to be kind when no one else is around to annoy you. Kindness can also be ignored in light of criticizing the Thomas Kindkaiders.

Since Genesis 3 image-bearers have been unkind to fellow image-bearers; our age has just multiplied the speed of ugly with caffeine and the internet.

Today I want to consider the fact that failing to be kind is foolish because it hurts you more than it hurts anyone else. You hurt and harm yourself most when you’re unkind to others.

Let’s start by seeing the biblical opposite of that in Provers 21:21, namely, the personal advantages that come from showing kindness. The proverb is composed of two parts that connect kindness with benefits for those who show kindness, not for those who receive it.

Whoever pursues righteousness and kindness
will find life, righteousness, and honor.
(Proverbs 21:21, ESV)

1. The Pursuit (verse 21a_ 

The first half of the proverb sets the stage and tells us about the pursuit of kindness.

Whoever pursues righteousness and kindness

The Kind of Pursuit

We don’t pursue something with a sit-around-and-wait attitude. Think of a craving or an irresistible desire that moves someone toward a goal. Informally, we talk about “dogging” someone or something (obviously not here in the sense of cutting someone down, but) in the sense of relentlessly hounding until you get what you’re chasing.

Very few, if any, roll out of bed in the morning having a good grasp on kindness. The person in verse 21 is characterized by their ongoing pursuit.

There’s a great example of this kind of thoughtful, initiating, committed kindness by King David. In 2 Samuel 9, David had been king for a little while, and it almost seems like out-of-nowhere he asked out loud in verse 1 (then through verse 13).

”Is there still anyone left of the house of Saul, that I may show him kindness for Jonathan’s sake?”

He must have organized a team of people to find the answer, perhaps the first Kindness Committee in history. David pursued the question with an old servant in Saul’s house named Ziba (verses 2-4). Then he sent men from Jerusalem to Lo-Debar, perhaps 125-150 miles away, to get this crippled relative of Jonathan’s named Mephibosheth. He brings this unworthy, fearful young man to his palace, promises him kindness (verse 7), and then honors him by not only seating him at his table (verses 7, 10), but restoring to him all that belonged to Saul and his house (verse 9). Mephibosheth was like a son to David from that moment on (verse 11).

That was a pursuit of kindness. And even though we might not have all to offer someone that King David did, we have so many ways we can show thought and care for others. When, if ever, have you pursued kindness like that?

The Objects of Pursuit

Obviously we’ve been talking about kindness, but there are two objects we’re chasing: righteousness and kindness .

In context, the idea of righteousness also has to do with how we treat other people, rather than how we act before God (though the two cannot be separated totally). This righteousness is treating others with equity, justice, and fairness.

And kindness , the point of the message, is a summary of looking not only to your own interests, but also to interests of others (Philippians 2:3).

The Hebrew word for kindness here is hesed, a common term in the OT, and one of the handful of Hebrew words even preachers who don’t know Hebrew know. When used from men to men, it meant doing favors and benefits for others, especially those who were lowly or miserable or needy.

The two things go together: righteousness and kindness. Don’t think you’re being kind to someone by lying to them, even if you think telling them the truth will hurt. That’s unrighteous. At the same time, don’t think it’s alright to walk all over someone because they did something wrong. That’s unkindness. Pursue both righteousness and kindness.

How many among us could use a little kindness thrown their direction.

2. The Promise (verse 21b)

The wise person will pursue righteousness and kindness because it’s right and because it has benefits. Whoever pursues righteousness and kindness,

will find life, righteousness, and honor.

This is why the title for the message is “The Kindness Boomerang.” When you throw out kindness, it comes back to you even better than when it left your hand. Three results are listed in the second half of verse 21.

First, those who pursue kindness will find life . Almost always in the OT “life” refers to a quality of life; a mouthwatering joy in the process, not just more years added to your (grumpy) life. Isn’t it often visible that the happiest people are also very kind people? Thinking about your life, as opposed to thinking about others, is one of the surest ways to be miserable and prepare yourself to die alone.

Second, those who pursue kindness will find righteousness . This angle has to do with a person’s integrity and conscience, before men and before God. You have nothing to be ashamed of; your character will be honorable.

And third, those who pursue kindness will find glory . This takes the previous benefit to another level. This last word, glory , means you earn a reputation and make a name for yourself by being kind. You will get more, or at least better, notice and more reward than if you’re catty, complaining, resentful. If you really want to make a name for yourself, be kind.

Notice that there are two objects pursued, and three results. You get back more than you give. Of course, if you move glory out of the result list in the second part of the proverb, and into the pursuit list in the first part, you’ll miss out on all the benefits. (There are other contexts where we are to pursue a certain kind of glory, as in Romans 2:6-7, but the proverbial context keeps it as an indirect object.)

Conclusion

I said at the beginning that failing to be kind is foolish because it hurts you more than it hurts others. We saw the opposite of that in Proverbs 21:21, that being kind is wise because it helps you. But now consider Proverbs 11:17.

A man who is kind benefits himself,
but a cruel man hurts himself.
(Proverbs 11:17, ESV)

The positive and the negative are both here. You benefit yourself by being kind, and the benefits are spelled out in 21:21. But God says, the cruel man, the unkind, harsh, mean, unthoughtful, selfish person, hurts himself.

Being unkind hurts me more than it hurts you. Being unkind is self-destructive. It destroys your joy, it destroys your character, and it destroys your reputation.

The wise man is kind and benefits himself. The fool is cruel and hurts himself.


Charge

As the Lord has shown great kindness to you, pursue righteousness and kindness.

Benediction:

The LORD bless you and keep you;
The LORD make his face to shine upon you and be gracious to you;
the LORD lift up his countenance upon you and give you peace. (Numbers 6:24-26, ESV)

See more sermons from the Get Wisdom - Studies in Proverbs series.