To be “put-upon” is to be used, taken advantage of, exploited, victimized. For the last two chapters of Genesis Jacob has been put-upon again and again. He has been the victim of deceit, which he sort of deserved as a consequence of his own deception, though the LORD protected him from being completely devastated, which he didn’t deserve but got because of God’s grace. The LORD even started to cause Jacob to prosper, with sons and “large flocks, female servants and male servants, and camels and donkeys” (30:43). But his blessings were starting to make the in-laws bitter, and the one who’s been doing the victimizing whines like he’s the victim. It’s common for the putter-on to act put-upon.

It’s a long story, taking fifty-five verses in Genesis 31. As the ESV breaks it up there are ten paragraphs. The main character in the first three is Jacob: “Now Jacob” (v.1), “So Jacob” (v.4), “So Jacob” (v.17). Then there are three with Laban: “When…Laban” (v.22), “And Laban” (v.25), “So Laban” (v.33). The last three are also Laban: “Then Laban” (v.43), “Then Laban” (v.51), “[And] Laban” (v.55). Right before that is one with Jacob: “Then Jacob” (v.36), a response to Laban’s confrontation. Let’s look at the first two today, Jacob’s Steals Away (verses 1-21) and Laban Runs After (verses 22-35).

Jacob Steals Away (verses 1-21)

Jacob had started to think about returning to his homeland after Joseph was born (30:25). But at least six years have passed since then.

His Reasons (verses 1-3)

There are three reasons in as many verses that caused Jacob to think that now was the time to go home.

First, Jacob heard that the sons of Laban were saying, “Jacob has taken all that was our father’s, and from what was our father’s he has gained all this wealth” (verse 1). This is maybe a quarter true. Jacob didn’t have anything when he arrived twenty years ago. His increase did come because of his service to Laban. But it was all earned as part of a contract. Jacob had been working for his wages which were paid out of Laban’s possessions. The sons, however, were bitter and would have voted for more wealth for themselves without more work for themselves. They saw their father’s holdings, their future holdings, going to someone else.

Second, Jacob saw that Laban did not regard him with favor as before (verse 2). A better translation would be, “the face of Laban was not with him.” That is, Laban didn’t put on a happy face for Jacob anymore. Laban never fully trusted Jacob or treated him with full-hearted favor, but at least he masked his selfishness. Now the mask was off and Jacob was a persona non grata, a person not pleasing.

Third, and most decisive, Then the LORD said to Jacob, “Return to the land of your fathers and to your kindred, and I will be with you” (verse 3). God’s word made leaving an obedience issue not a wisdom call. Along with the command was a promise, that the LORD would be with Jacob, which makes his way of leaving unnecessary, and possibly detrimental.

His Persuasion (verses 4-16)

Jacob wants to go home with what is his, not all by himself, empty-handed like he had left. But what would his family say, in particular his wives for whom Paddan-aram was home?

So Jacob sent and called Rachel and Lean into the field where his flock was in order to sound them out away from eavesdropping ears. Maybe they wouldn’t be favorable, or maybe Laban’s servants would overhear and run to tell their boss.

Next Jacob gives them a long speech to persuade them in verses 5-13.

I see that your father does not regard me with favor as he did before. But the God of my father has been with me. You know that I have served your father with all my strength, yet your father has cheated me and changed my wages ten times. But God did not permit him to harm me. If he said, ‘The spotted shall be your wages,’ then all the flock bore spotted; and if he said, ‘The striped shall be your wages,’ then all the flock bore striped. Thus God has taken away the livestock of your father and given them to me. In the breeding season of the flock I lifted up my eyes and saw in a dream that the goats that mated with the flock were striped, spotted, and mottled. Then the angel of God said to me in the dream, ‘Jacob,’ and I said, ‘Here I am!’ And he said, ‘Lift up your eyes and see, all the goats that mate with the flock are striped, spotted, and mottled, for I have seen all that Laban is doing to you. I am the God of Bethel, where you anointed a pillar and made a vow to me. Now arise, go out from this land and return to the land of your kindred.’” (Genesis 31:5–13)

Jacob tells them that he sees their father’s disapproval and, even more, he’s tired of their father’s manipulation. Your father has cheated me and changed my wages ten times . That could be similar to our saying “a dozen times,” a round number to express a bunch. But if sheep give birth twice a year and it’s been six years, it could easily have been the last ten times or ten of eleven. Laban was “jacobing” Jacob (Hamilton).

The cheating and changing wages are the same, and it relates to what would be Jacob’s. The account in the last part of chapter 30 summarized it, but Laban kept seeing new, strong sheep and goats matching the striped, specked, and spotted sort and thought it was too high a percentage. Laban kept revising the deal to benefit himself.

Jacob explains that God was the one who did not permit him to harm me. God has taken away the livestock of your father and given them to me. God even showed Jacob that He was responsible for the profitable breeding, that it wasn’t due to the white sticks he set at the watering trough. God blessed Jacob even as Laban kept putting upon him.

God also told Jacob that it was time to return (verse 13). This must be at the end of the six years rather than the beginning since there is no mention of a dream in chapter 30. But would his wives come along?

Then Rachel and Leah answered and said to him, “Is there any portion or inheritance left to us in our father’s house? Are we not regarded by him as foreigners? For he has sold us, and he has indeed devoured our money. All the wealth that God has taken away from our father belongs to us and to our children. Now then, whatever God has said to you, do.” (Genesis 31:14–16)

Last we saw these sisters they were at each other’s throats. Now they have a common enemy, so at least they are co-belligerents if not allies. They recognize that they’ve been treated like foreigners not daughters, more like property than persons, and that their father has cheated them out of their due. Laban either kept deserved dowry from them or was keeping goods from their husband. Either way, they are ready to disassociate with their dad and follow Jacob and his God.

His Plan (verses 17-21)

There was no time like the present, apparently. Moses doesn’t say how long it took to pack, but the next thing we’re told it that they were off. Jacob arose from talking in the field and set his sons and his wives on camels . He took all his livestock, all his property that he had gained, the livestock in his possession that he had acquired in Paddan-aram. Look at all the “his”es; he’s took everything but the kitchen sink.

Where were his goodbyes? There weren’t any, on purpose. Laban had gone to sheer his sheep . Fleecing was a long process, obviously even longer with a flock that was larger. It required lots of men and usually took multiple days every spring. Laban was swamped which is why he didn’t find out until three days later (verse 22). Jacob stole away and tricked Laban the Aramean, by not telling him that he intended to flee . As the ESV notes, “tricked” is actually “stole the heart of.” “The Hebrew verb for stole here is gānaḇ, which appears seven times in this narrative (vv. 19, 20, 26, 27, 30, 32, 39)” (Hamilton). Both “tricked” and “deceived” (NAS) make sense but miss the parallel with Rachel’s theft. He stole Laban’s knowledge; Jacob “jacobed” Laban. Even though God promised to be with him, he still thought better to not face his father-in-law directly. Who knows what kind of “offer” Laban would make that he couldn’t refuse.

In the process, with Laban out of the house, Rachel stole her father’s household gods . This will be a major point of tension in about a week and a half, and Jacob doesn’t know about it.

They all fled and made good progress toward Canaan and got as far as the hill country of Gilead .

Laban Runs After (verses 22-35)

Laban could not let go, in a couple ways, since he was all wrapped up in his ego like a wool sweater. He had to get his gods back and, probably more essential to him, he had to get in the last word.

His Chase (verses 22-24)

When it was told Laban on the third day that Jacob had fled, he took his kinsmen with him and pursued seven days and followed close after him into the hill country of Gilead . Jacob had a three day head start but also women, children, and hundreds of slow animals to move. That’s no match for Laban’s posse who pursued Jacob, they “hunted” him down. Laban was in hot pursuit and in ten days was right on Jacob’s heels.

But God came to Laban the Aramean in a dream by night and said to him, “Be careful not to say anything to Jacob, either good or bad.” This is a warning. Laban was hot, this cools him down a bit.

His Confrontation (verses 25-32)

It’s not hard to believe that Laban overtook Jacob . We see two camps of tents and Laban comes out in the morning with his mouth going full speed and confronting Jacob about abduction, trickery, and robbery.

”What have you done, that you have tricked me and driven away my daughters like captives of the sword?” “What have you done?” is the exact question Jacob asked Laban the morning after being drunk-hitched to Leah; Laban shows no awareness of the irony. “Tricked me” is again “stolen my heart,” and in a few verses Laban confronts Jacob for having stolen his gods. Laban thinks he’s been put-upon, and he thinks his daughters were being abused by Jacob, that he needs to save them, and that they are on his side. He didn’t want to know the truth. ”Why did you flee secretly and trick men, and did not tell me, so that I might have sent you away with mirth and songs, with tambourine and lyre?” Puh-lease, Louise. Is Laban acting the brave knight, here to rescue, or is he acting the wounded father? Can he be both? He’s trying to be. “I would have thrown you a going-away party.” How did Jacob not interrupt him at this point and say, “Are you kidding me?”

Laban continues to dig like the always disapproving family member. ”Now you have done foolishly.” It gets worse. ”It is in my power to do you harm.” “You” is plural, “it is in my power to do every one of you harm.” But who was he going to harm? The daughters and children he missed kissing? The ones he was coming to rescue? Turns out, he’s bloviating. He’s verbalizing his self-imagined self-importance. When you can’t be tough, bluff. And oh, by the way, ”The God of your father spoke to me last night, saying, “Be careful not to say anything to Jacob, either good or bad.”

”And now you have gone away because you longed greatly for your father’s house, but why did you seal my gods?” As if he said, “Jacob, we all know that you’re a homesick homebody. But why did you take my idols?”

Jacob shows great restraint, as well as remarkable ignorance that could have cost him. He does explain that he thought Laban might have forcibly kept his daughters, though wasn’t it just Laban who accused Jacob of forcibly taking them (verse 26)? It was the kind of thing Laban would do.

Then Jacob urges Laban to look for his gods and vows that the thief would be put to death. For what it’s worth, the Code of Hammurabi made it a capital offense to steal temple property (Wenham). Jacob did not know that Rachel had stolen them. From our perspective, we’re thinking more, “Uh oh.” “The ancient reader would not miss the sarcasm in this story, for here is a new crime—“godnapping”! (Hamilton)

His Search (verses 33-35)

With fabulous effect Moses lets the suspense build like water pooling higher up around a lit candle. Laban starts with the deceiver’s tent, Jacob. He didn’t find anything. Then he went into Leah’s tent, then Zilpah and Bilhah’s. He must have gone into Rachel’s tent last because he knew that Jacob loved Rachel and wouldn’t possibly have put her under threat of death.

Rachel had taken the household gods and put them in the camel’s saddle and sat on them . Moses never tells us why she took them in the first place. Maybe it was to sell them for money. Maybe it was for her own worship. Maybe she believed that whoever held the gods was in charge of the family. Maybe it was just for spite, taking something she knew her dad valued, unlike how he valued her. Whatever the reason, she’s committed now.

Laban felt all about the tent, but he did not find them . The last time someone “felt” something was when Isaac felt Jacob’s face (Genesis 27:22).

Rachel said to her father, “Let not my lord be angry that I cannot rise before you, for the way of women is upon me.” It was her time of the month, or so she said. Not only have the figurines been stolen, they are being used as menstrual rags. Laban didn’t find what he was looking for.

Conclusion

We’ll see in the remaining part of the chapter how Jacob responds in defense and if he and Laban will come to blows or depart in peace.

Jacob, however, is showing some leadership and his wives actually follow. He also gives credit to God for his increase, which is a move in the right direction.

Most instructive is, don’t expect everyone to be happy for you when God blesses you. And don’t be surprised when petty leaders always think someone else, probably you, is to blame for their misfortune. “Whoever hates his brother is in the darkness and walks in the darkness, and does not know where he is going, because the darkness has blinded his eyes” (1 John 2:11). The spiritually-blind always claim to be the victim, and that means there will always be a lot of self-identifying victims who aren’t victims at all.